Updates on our mini farm: Animals!

Posted on May 22, 2012 by

I got y’all caught up on the yard and garden. Ha, there is never such thing as “caught up” around here. Thought I would give you a tiny update on the critters:

Goats

Coraline, 10 minutes old

I never had time to announce the birth of our babies! How fitting that our first goatling arrived on Friday the 13th, adding a nice touch of authentic gruesome fun to our party night. We were a little disappointed to only have single births, but I guess that is common for first time does. They look almost exactly like their mamas did last year! We love our little reruns, named Buddy and Coraline. This year wasn’t nearly as scary as last year’s birth.  We are learning. We even dehorned them ourselves and, ummm, fixed our boy.  Brave indeed!  Sometimes the things I do feel like someone else’s life!

Buddy and Coraline frolicking

This week has been a challenge though as we have attempted to separate them from their mamas in preparation for weaning and relocating them. To say they cry would be an understatement. I’ve had reports that neighbors 6 doors down can hear the bleating wails of moms and kids! I am almost certain the hoarse but high pitched “Maaaaaaaaaamm!” can be heard from space. If you hear an unsettling cry on the wind, wherever you are, my apologies. This may be the worst part of goating, I think. Even worse than mucking the goat shed (which really needs to be done again, gulp!) The best part? Maybe the 2 gallons a day we are getting of awesome, fresh goat milk. We have our system down and can detect zero goatiness in the milk.  Infinitely better than my first taste!  Not only can I drink it straight without wrinkling my nose, but we all love it and have sworn off the plastic gallon jugs.  A sigh of relief as we sport our goat-staches!

Bunnies

Two studs: Shea’s bro Nick and our buck, Gizer.

We have a great system going. Even as we just tucked 8 away in the freezer, we have another batch about 4 weeks from full size and a brand new batch born yesterday (I know baby bunnies are called “kindles” but I keep saying batches like they are a bucket of cookie dough or something). The plan is working well because there are always cute fuzzies to play with and by the time they are big enough to “process” there are more cute fuzzies. My kids actually enjoy eating rabbit and we have become used to the whole routine. We’ve come a long way. I hate to use the word desensitized, but maybe that is what we are. The actual killing moment remains traumatic, but beyond that I am a little amazed to say I can skin and clean a rabbit faster than Shea, so that has weirdly become my job. A testament to our sickness might be the dinner I brought to my inlaws house for Easter Sunday:

Herbed Easter Bunnies on a bed of carrots.

We are getting good use and NEVER waste a scrap of meat. I usually prepare one in the crock pot a week.  We use it in any recipe you would fix with chicken.  Then the bones go back in the crock pot and simmer until I get every drop of broth out of it that I can. Factor in that we harvest the “bunny berries” and use it for fertilizer…homemade miracle grow!…and I think we can say the rabbits have been really good to us! For further value, I thought of making lucky rabbit feet key rings for Christmas gifts, but that seems a little much. :)   I wanted to promote mindful eating practices, especially after reading Michael Pollan’s Omnivores Dilemma, and I think we have done just that.

Chee Chees

Big Bertha, we couldn’t even shut the carton on this bad boy.

More than a year later, we still call them chee chees.  We started with 4 and now have 15 (I think).  We get about a dozen eggs a day. We are enjoying the farm freshness, the bright orange yolks, and the occasional mutant egg.  I sell extra eggs to friends and neighbors for $4/doz.  Sometimes I even get cool trades (That load of dirt I used in the front yard actually cost me 6 dozen eggs.) The chickens are fun to watch and come running anytime we venture out hoping we have a bucket of kitchen scraps for them. NOTHING goes to waste around here! I even learned how to make a homemade calcium supplement out of powdered egg shells (link here), so what we don’t wash and feed back to the chickens I can actually use myself!  Chickens are fun and low maintenance, I highly recommend them for your backyard! (Google urban coops to see all kinds of possibilities!)

Family

Shea has the gift to nap anywhere. He deserved this one!

And how about the other animals?  We are, well, tired. Shea and I go to bed aching every night from all the work we put in. Spring is the busiest time of year. Except maybe Fall. And the time in between. It is sometimes frustrating to work our schedule around milking time and the kids aren’t always excited to do farm chores (Come on, who wouldn’t line up to shovel poo?) But overall, we are loving it. I feel like this gopher-ridden patch of dandelions was made for us and my head literally spins with more projects to start! Come visit anytime, Purple Barn is a fun place to play.

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Updates on our Mini Farm: Yard and Garden

Posted on May 21, 2012 by

I really intended to write more about the farm. The timely posts that have expired and been tossed to my mental junk folder are numerous indeed. Despite the best of intentions, this barnyard life has us hopping and there has been no time! So here is a long overdue catch up….

Yard

Our half acre is overwhelming but fun.  Despite multiple applications of weed and feed, I think we actually fed the weeds! The lawn is hopelessly infested with gophers and no amount of gassing, poisoning, or trapping has seemed to deter the buggers.  So our yard is a shambles and a shame on a street full of perfectly manicured landscapes.  But we are trying!

I built beds in the front yard and am working on a brick border. It looks promising.  I tried not to be discouraged with my budget landscaping as Zaida and I hauled the dirt I got free and reclaimed bricks (fancy word for scrounged) by ourselves all morning.  Meanwhile, I watched teams of professional landscapers driving by to work on other houses in the ‘hood.  I’d like to think I am green with grass stains rather than jealousy, but I will admit it: I have yard envy.   Just when I was about to think I would never finish the job before I had to return a borrowed trailer, a neighbor with bigger muscles than me pitched in and we had it all hauled before Shea got home.  Have I mentioned I have the nicest neighbors ever? Unless Shea reads my blog, he may never know I didn’t do it all myself.  It is good for him to think I work harder than I do, right? :) The beds are looking good.   I may not have the finances for a professional touch, but hey…my way burns more calories!  We plan on “edible landscaping.” What else? I have already planted comfrey for the animals and lavender.  Elderberries are in the corner (which I only know from Monte Python fame “your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of Elderberries!) I have flats of annuals I can’t wait to plant after I get the border done and plan to put tall sunflowers along the fence.

Do child labor laws apply to your own children? Move it, Zaida! ha ha

Now I only need to figure out how to build a little brick wall. How hard can it be?

For earth day we planted 8 new crabapple trees on the parking strip.  My saving grace is my container garden which is starting to look awesome.  We lined the front walk way with assorted ceramic pots.  I am hoping it draws the eye away from our spacious tribute to dandelion virility.  Sigh. As an extra bonus, the pots hide a lot of the spray paint the previous owners left all over the cement. (Anyone know how to get that off? Pressure washing didn’t do it.)

Garden

I am so excited to announce our garden is nearly ready to go! We built 2 boxes last year and are just finishing 2 more this spring. Sad to say I missed the cold crop planting, but we have big plans for our now EIGHT HUNDRED SQUARE FEET of raised beds!  They are theoretically gopher proof and the dirt was delivered an hour ago.  (That’s in addition to the huge load of composted horse manure I hauled in my van–I need a truck!!)  We have half the trellises built and the rest will be done this week.  We are optimistically looking forward to a huge harvest.  I have been playing with new ways (new to me) to preserve mass quantities of produce and we are loving the thought that we might not have to buy veggies anymore. Hopefully tonight we get to plant! I have been hardening off my plants (started indoors) and after weeding, building, hauling and generally working our tails off, I can’t wait for the “fun part.” Second only to “picking,” planting is big fun for our family.

Chicken wire to deter gophers, recycling at its best to block weeds, and then lots and lots of dirty fun!

Shea and his helpers fashioned removable trellises which we will also use to construct “hot houses” next spring. Yay!

Outside the box (ha ha) we have other experiments starting to take off.  My raspberry patch is thriving and spreading so that my mouth is already watering.  I have gojii berries planted that are starting to sport bright green chutes.  The cheapest I’ve ever found the super berries are ten bucks a pound so I thought why not grow them? Plans are in the works to grow sunflowers, jerusalem artichokes, pumpkins, and sweet potatoes.  And heaven knows we are not-so-patiently waiting for the 14 fruit trees we planted a year and a half ago to take off.  Can’t believe we have lived here that long already! Considering there was not so much as a strawberry planted when we got here, this is exciting stuff!  Well, back to hauling dirt. I will update you on the animal fun tomorrow!

We spent Earth Day sprucing up our piece of the planet. I know, you want my hat.

Posted in Kristin, Lifestyle, Projects | Tagged , , | 5 Comments

It’s A Walking Dead Man’s Party: Friday the 13th at our house.

Posted on April 13, 2012 by

At our house, we can be a little morbid. I know this. Some kids are scared of the dark or get nightmares from scary movies. My kids, they were raised on spooky flicks.  In fact, I almost had Tayler in a movie theater. Not really, but when I saw Darkness Falls while 9 months pregnant, I swear I almost went into labor. Intense.

When Damon was in preschool, the teacher raised concern that when they drew clowns, he drew a monster clown with fangs and claws. I feigned surprise as Damon proudly showed his rendition of “Killer Klowns from Outerspace.”  A classic at the Whitaker home.  Halloween is our glory.  We laugh where others fear…or vomit.  My kids are going to be demented like me.  I daresay they ARE the things that go bump in the night.

Shea's birthday invitation. "Drop in or Drop Dead"

When Friday the 13th rolls around, I automatically know I have plans. They include the same group of people and roughly the same agenda: scary movies, awesome eats. (Tonight we have plans to watch as many movies as we can stay up for while feasting Zombie style on BBQ spare ribs. I can’t wait!) But earlier this year something rare and amazing happened: my favorite day fell on my favorite person’s birthday.  So it was that to celebrate my hubby Shea’s 33rd year of life, we all had a party to die for.  January the 13th, a freaky friday like no other, will live on in lore.

I was inspired by Charity’s posts of plaid and tweed and required, for the first time ever, a dress code. Anything zombie. The deader the better.  Damon (or Daemon?) was great in a shredded white tailed tuxedo top and his, umm, bloody nub. Even Zaida (3) got into the action. She couldn’t wait for the “Jombie” party and asks me every day when we get to be Jombies again.

Birthday Boy with his Morbid Mama

Zaida's best impression of a "Jombie"

Tayler and Damon in various stages of decomposure.

And by far my favorite picture is Bruce McClellan with my kids. Now Brucie was responsible for my training, growing up, in all things gruesome. He personally made sure I knew the classics, like Nosferatu and Frankenstein and continued with B-grade flicks like “Attack of the Killer Shrews” and “Them.”  He took me to every haunted house in the valley and shared his ghost hunting skills.  I thank/blame him for my corruption.  Now he is working on the next generation.  Love that man.

hmmm...I swear those ghosts in the back weren't there when I took the picture!

Edibles: Gruesome Deliciousness is one of my favorite pass times. Go ahead, ask me for my recipe for meat rats [meatloaf shaped like rats with gooey red cheesy guts complete with lunch meat ears (they shrivel just right) and a beef jerky tail]. Or maybe you want my monster mashed potatoes: they look like a heaping scoop of guts on your plate but they taste great! This night featured classic finger foods and, in pure zombie decadence, a giant chocolate brain cake.

Spinach Artichoke Intestines...a big hit!

The Birthday Cake

The main event was a zombie walk.  We had a fog machine and strobe and hosted a zombie parade in the front yard. Oh, if I only knew how to get the footage off my outdated camera onto the computer! But imagine an episode of “Walking Dead” in my front yard.  The twitching, ambling, empty stare of my most beloved friends and family make me absolutely giddy.  The parade of the underage undead was probably my favorite part.  Really warms a mother’s heart to see the kids get so into their roles.

So what are you doing tonight? May I suggest you get in touch with your dark side?  Explore the horror?  Gather your loved ones and make it a movie night macabre.  I recommend Monster House or Ghost Busters for beginners.  Walking Dead for the more advanced.  Way more advanced.

Each Friday the 13h, I encourage my kids to fully express their gruesomeness in the hopes that for the rest of the year, we can walk more nobly in the land of the living.  Cheers!

Posted in Kristin, Lifestyle | Tagged , , | 4 Comments

Sorry, I lost my voice….My break from blogging.

Posted on April 11, 2012 by

Is it April, really? I mean, I had a new year’s resolution to blog more often and you’re telling me it’s been 3 1/2 months since my last post? Wha?
I have pondered my blog-dom and wondered what would possibly keep me from the beloved annals of whereverthere (I have always wanted to use that word in a sentence.)

Writer’s block? Nope. I have pages of scrawled notes and post-its of things I intended to write.  Such never-read favorites as “Walking Dead Man’s Party” and “the Day we Ate the Easter Bunny.”

Too busy to write? Nope. I am, in fact, ALWAYS too busy to write but that never stopped me before.

Lost my limbs in a tragic tubing accident and have postponed blogging until I become proficient at nose-typing? uhh…nope.

Though I stammered excuses to the maybe 2 people who asked why I wasn’t blogging, I didn’t have a good answer.  Then, I finally figured it out…I lost my voice.

This may not be my most adventurous of posts, but I imagine other people out there have had this happen so I decided to explore it.

Have you ever stopped doing something because you knew you weren’t the best at it? Because you thought it didn’t matter to anyone? Because so many other people did it that you figured you wouldn’t be missed or even noticed?  Have you ever dismissed your thoughts as tiny and unoriginal? Have you ever thought your life was so small and ordinary that no one would ever want to read about it? Or hear about it? Or own your action figure? Okay, getting off track.

I was literally talked out of blogging by a little voice inside my head.  I cringe to think of all the other projects/paths/accomplishments that voice has persuaded me to abandon.

I serve in the young women’s organization in my area (my favorite place to serve!) and get to know the youth pretty well. They call me spider legs. Compliment? We spend a lot of time trying to instill in the girls a sense of their worth and divine nature. We invest much thought and prayer trying to figure out how to prepare them for their dazzling futures.  Sometimes, as a youth leader, I feel so focused on their potential, their possibilities, that I end up feeling like the discounted loaf of wonder bread…a little past my date.

I don’t think it is unusual to feel incredibly ordinary, uncommonly common. To feel a little passed by, like you could have done more or been more.  I wonder if this feeling is an everyone thing or a stay at home mom thing. Or a me thing.

I stopped blogging because everything I started to write screamed at me that it had been done before and been said better by someone else. Probably a lot of someone elses.  I told myself that it was arrogant to think any of my little misadventures deserved the time it takes to be read, let alone the time it takes to write. I told myself I had too many other things to do that were more practical. I kept telling myself it didn’t matter anyway.

But guess what?  It did matter…to me!  I would never say this out loud, but I love to write! Even just writing those words makes me nervous because I can feel expectations hanging in the air.  But there it is.  I love to write.  It makes me feel good.  It helps me process things.  It commemorates moments, moments that may not be earth shattering but that nonetheless make up my life.

“So there,” I told that little voice.

How can I tell the youth in my ‘hood how valuable and infinitely worthy they are if I give up on myself so easily! I once cynically said that all I did was encourage young women to grow up to be women to encourage young women.  I hate it when that little voice leaks out of my own mouth as sarcasm.  What an awesome thing to grow up, to survive the perilous gauntlet of adolescence and be able to share some survival tips! What I have to realize is that it doesn’t mean my journey ended.  Quite the opposite! I read back over my old blog posts and realized how much learning I did in JUST ONE YEAR!  How much more do I get to do in the future? Writing helped me shove that little voice. And amazingly, for all the CS Lewis, Mother Theresa and Parade Magazine I read, it was MY writing that did it!

I often get lost in other people’s projects. This is not a complaint. I love that I have an interesting resume made up of other people’s visions. I get to play a part in their adventures.  And then there are my projects, built to help shape and strengthen my family.  Little undertakings, like, you know A BARNYARD!!  And our whole food lifestyle. And my family itself!  I am passionate about these, it is true.

But blogging…see that is just for me.  I wish I could say I had an epic novel on the horizon (congrats to Charity, by the way, on the upcoming release of her first book!!!)  I wish I wrote a column in a credible publication of some kind.  But every time I hit “publish” on a blog post, I get a tingle of accomplishment.  I wrote SOMETHING.  Isn’t that what writer’s do?

So brace yourself, little voice; my intense red-headed mommy voice is much louder than you, just ask my kids.  I am telling you to shut it. I don’t have to be the best or the most original. I don’t have to rock the blogosphere. I just gotta be me. Ahhh…at last something I am the best at!

Posted in Kristin, Lifestyle | Tagged | 8 Comments

Ten Year Tribute: Happy Anniversary to my Jr High Sweetheart

Posted on December 28, 2011 by

Today is my anniversary. Ten years ago we sealed the deal on a plan I hatched long ago. I still wonder if Shea knows what hit him.

It started in a galaxy far, far away. Junior High.  Erika described it this way, “…it was pretty much just the worst of times.  After all, it was Jr. High School.  As a matter of fact, the best thing to come out of  those years of awkwardness, orthodontia, and grunge fashion might just be this blog.”  In my mind, the blog is the second best thing.  Somehow, amid the painful inelegance and dental subjugation, I managed to fall head over heels (and not just because of my baggy pants) for the tall, handsome new guy in town. (It’s okay, my plaid flannel hid the fact that my pants were low riding).  Ahh yes…1993.

There is no psycho stalker alive that can match the stealth and perseverance of a twitterpated teenage girl.  Within days of school starting, I knew his locker and when he frequented, his class schedule, who he hung with, and even the routes he took to which classes and when. All this intel was carefully integrated to insure that I “bumped” into him as often as possible.  He had first period science with me.  I worked behind the scenes, playing TA duty and buying off others by doing their homework to eventually get the seating chart arranged to sit Mr. Whitaker right behind me.  There I continued to mercilessly seduce him with extreme tactics like Reeses Peanut Butter Cups and handholding games like “Mercy” and “Slaps.”  Ahh, the pain was worth it.

For all my passive aggressive scheming, I came to be really good friends with Shea.  I was too self-conscious and awkward to ever bust a real move, but I was happy to claim him among my best friends. I wonder if he ever suspected that Mrs. Kristin Whitaker was written all over my journal.  Life was smooth until the cruel hand of fate intervened.  Ever changing school boundaries would heartlessly tear us apart. It was so Capulet and Montague…I was slated to be a Bountiful High Brave while my love-object would be a Viewmont Viking along with Erika, Charity, and 95% of the rest of our school.  The injustice! The tragedy!  While all other ninth graders rejoiced as the last day of school approached, I mourned inwardly with all the intensity of a 15 year old girl.  My life was over.  Our relationship surely would not survive without the carefully planned accidental rendezvous in the hallways, without the notes I passed in English class to remind him of my existence, without the bribery of confections and bubblegum I offered in science class. It was surely over.  He would be swept away by hundreds of adoring, beautiful Viking women and I would be a lonely Brave.  I wish I could go back and tell myself then what I know now!

I have only two pictures existing from those days.  First, this is us signing yearbooks on the last day of Jr. High. I am sure I wrote something charming and friendly, encoding a deep and unending love and perhaps a phone number into my scribbles.  And what did my Prince Charming write in mine? I breathlessly ran to a quiet corner alone to find out…

“Dear Kristin, you always were the strong silent type…but enough about your farts. Have a great summer! Shea”

Second, is a picture from ninth grade Lagoon Day. I was thrilled Shea opted to wander the amusement park with me and my girls (you’ll notice Erika sitting/ screaming next to me) but still didn’t have the gumption to sit next to him. I could move heaven and earth to arrange our proximity, but couldn’t be so direct as to actually sit by him!  Funny. I have since overcome that.

High school was not as tragic as I had feared. Shea and I stayed in touch for awhile.  I used to ride my bike to his house to listen to these really cool things called CDs, a new musical novelty.  Shea actually asked me out on his sixteenth birthday and I was privileged to be his first date. Bestill my heart!  Here is a picture.

be cool, Kristin; just be cool.

Can you tell my heart is in my throat and I can hardly breathe? Of course not, I was too smooth for that in my borrowed black suede vest. We went to Desert Star Playhouse and ate pizza.  For our ten year, we are revisiting the theater.  Hopefully I will get more action afterwards.

We went to a few dances and sports events. When our rival teams played, he would come sit on the Brave side with me and I thought he was so, err, brave.  I mean, I had to sit on the bleachers with the pep band–I was on drumline–he willingly ventured there!

Shea even took me to prom. I think the pictures say it all.

Don't think I ever told him he slammed my hair in the door.

We made some amazing memories and were pretty close in those days, but still the man would take another 8 years to kiss me. I was tortured by that then, but now I have the supreme satisfaction of torturing him.  Somehow through the drama of high school, we gradually lost touch.  In retrospect it was all for the better. By the time I ran into him at the airport 4 years later, I was done playing games and ready to play for keeps. Oh, and we both had our braces off.

The second I saw him again, the sparks flew. I picture myself suave and mysterious as Mr. Whitaker approached me that day. My mom, who witnessed the encounter, said my jaw was on the floor and I mumbled incoherently. I think I had a stellar line on board like, “wow, how tall are you now?”  Somehow, Shea called and asked me out anyway and the rest is history.  Five months after that we were married. Ten years later we are living it up on our half acre with 4 children, 2 hopefully pregnant goats, 3 rabbits, 12 chickens, 2 barn cats, and a frozen worm farm (oops).

Our engagement photo. No more baggy jeans and Doc Martin knock offs! We've come a long way!

I remember sitting on the beach the night before our wedding. We watched the moon rise over the waves and reminisced about our history.  I laid my head on his shoulder and wonder how it could get any better.  Funny, I do the same thing now.

In Junior High, I could barely manage the words “yes I like Shea. Yes, I LIKE like Shea” to my closest friends. But now I can proclaim to all Blog-dom…”I love Shea Whitaker!” He makes me laugh till I hurt, he catches my tears, he tolerates my downtimes and he builds my dreams. It is also a bonus to be helplessly attracted to my best friend.  I’ve had ten years to wonder how I got so lucky and forever to live it up!

At dinner the other day, while Shea was out, Becca (5) randomly piped up, “Mom I am so glad you married Daddy. If not you would still be walking up and down the streets saying, ‘Will you marry me? Will you marry me? Will somebody PLEASE marry me?!!!” Wow, thank you Shea for sparing me that fate!

Happy Ten Years!

Posted in Kristin, Lifestyle | Tagged | 3 Comments

My Not So Secret Weapon for Fighting the Flu

Posted on November 30, 2011 by

Okay, I have a goat post I have been sitting on for awhile, but I keep finding other things to write about. That sounded strange. I mean, I have updates about our goats since it has been so long since I’ve written a happy farm post. But that will wait til next week.

Kristin, you can't use that phrase, I own "favorite things!"

I am excited to share something with you all! What is a blog but show and tell anyway? Move over Oprah, this is my favorite thing of 2011:
Liquid Life Silver Water
Does that sound like a cheesy cologne name? It’s not. It is hands down the best natural remedy for cold and flu you can get. Read on…

Have you heard of silver as a nutritional supplement and natural remedy?  Silver is more than the boat fare across Styx or the filling in your back molar, it is a trace mineral your body loves.  Even early civilizations knew that Silver can be used as an antiviral and antibiotic (the history on this is interesting to me).

Paul Karason can tell you about the wrong sort of silver

You may have also heard about scary side effects. Ask this guy what an unstable silver compound can do to you.  But Liquid Life Silver Water is different, it is not a colloid or an ionic mineral salt.  This is the real deal.  It is a form called Crystalline. Oooh, I even like saying the word. That just means the element is so tiny (we’re talking Nanometers, another cool word!) that is can pass in and out of your system instantly and without leaving toxic residues behind.  In fact, crystalline minerals are the form that plants absorb from the soil.  Anything patterned after Mother Nature’s design just makes sense to me.

I actually have been working for the company that makes Liquid Life Mineral Waters, Golden Herbs.  They are the reason I get so little sleep this year…I am always up late working on their website or other projects.  Wouldn’t be so bad if I wasn’t teaching myself as I go, they are patient with me.  Anyway, that is how I came to know this amazing product.  Now on the site, I can’t legally make fantastic claims but on my blog, I can do whatever I want (unless Erika or Charity contest of course.) Here is what I have used and seen Silver used for:

I take it everyday to ward off the Flu. It’s more effective than Airborne in my opinion and easier to take. A little capful of nearly flavorless clear liquid is all it takes.  I even give it to my kiddies. We haven’t had so much as a runny nose yet this season. Considering I have 3 kids in public school and one at home, that’s not bad!

My sweet little niece broke out in sores all over her head.  Turned out to be staph, very painful for anyone let alone a 6 year old!  Her mom applied silver to the sores and was amazed when they nearly disappeared by morning!

I get strep once or twice every year and when I get strep I go down hard.  I know the dreaded signs and I am never wrong; strep and I are foes from way back.  Halloween eve I felt the tell tale aches and sore throat coming on.  I gargled with silver water that night and first thing in the morning and I was fine in time to trick or treat.  The miracle of this can not be overstated in my book.

I have put silver on minor scrapes, burns and owies at our house to protect from infection. It doesn’t sting and the kids don’t put up any kind of a fuss.

My mom has diluted it with distilled water and used silver as an eye wash to get rid of irritants and infections.  Crazy.

Move Over Windex, a new cure-all's in town

Am I starting to sound like Michael Constantine peddling Windex in Big Fat Greek Wedding?  May as well keep going then: silver kills odor causing bacteria. Soak your socks in  diluted silver water and let dry. Then sleep in the socks and have sweet feet in the morning. Mist your stinky shoes with the same thing.  I have heard some incredible recovery stories of people who responded to silver when antibiotics wouldn’t touch what ailed them.  I could go on.

I am not making commissions on this, I wouldn’t use the sacred cyber pages of whereverthere for my own selfish gains (or would I? Any sponsors out there?). The reason I was so excited to bring this up is because 1.  I LOVE SILVER WATER. I love giving my kids something good for them instead of relying on ineffective cold medications with their daunting list of side effects.  I also love that I have found a whole line of products to keep us healthy and “stick it to the man.”  :) and 2. drum roll please….I HAVE AN EXCLUSIVE OFFER FOR YOU ALL!

A deal on silver? It's just too much!

I have always wanted to be someone cool who pulled dazzling bargains out of my hat to the amazement of all. Okay, maybe it is not that grandiose, but I did get permission to offer my whereverthere friends a discount.  It normally costs $20 a bottle (one would probably last you an entire season!) But today you won’t pay 20. You won’t pay 19.  You won’t even pay 18.75.  Hold on to your seats…from now until the end of the year, you can get a whopping $2 off each bottle of silver you purchase.  That is a 10% of saving!  You read right, 10% less you have to pay to outsmart the cooties this year.

While you stand in awe, let me offer a disclaimer.  I am slowly but surely building and managing the website for Golden Herbs. I haven’t yet figured out how to offer coupon codes on Pay Pal (anyone out there? Throw me a bone.)  So until that happy day, if you are interested, simply browse the website, and let me know via Facebook, this site, my email, smoke signals, etc. what you might like to order and I will send you a Pay Pal invoice.

But wait there’s more!!!   If you live nearby, I will waive shipping charges and deliver it to you!  How cool is that?  Charity, if you order, I will bring it to your NYC door.  I WISH!!!

Anyway my friends, here are my most sincere wishes for health and happiness this nasty cold, wet, nose-blowing winter season.

Click here to see a blog post on the site that tells more about Silver and what it does. You may recognize the picture and writing style.

Or go directly to www.goldenherbs.net to see their full line of awesome products.

I used Zaida to model for a nose blow on the GH website. Exploitive? I don't think so. Not unless she's wearing animal print.

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I am thankful for…my body: the workout that kicked my clunker

Posted on November 23, 2011 by

The ultimate clunker: Do you feel this vehicle is safe for highway travel? Yes officer, yes I do.

Everyone has owned a junker…you know the clunky car you were thankful to own but slightly embarrassed by? The car you put a key in every morning and prayed as you listened to its efforts to respond. The car you may have kicked more than a few times. Whatever its faults, it was your car, you probably even named it (Delilah).  You knew its sweet spots: how to coax the engine to start, how to work the radio when nothing else worked, where and when to apply duct tape, how to shift just so to compensate for your crappy brakes. We have all had a car like that. We loved and loathed it. We depended on it. That sentiment is how I used to feel about my body.

I have a bad back.  Lots of people have back pain, but I attribute my sense of humor to mine.  It is not always predictable, it can be subtle or suddenly overcoming, and it oftentimes gets me in trouble.

Since the first time my back went out in 8th grade, I had more to worry about my body than just my pasty complexion and lack of coordination.  Long story short, my back used to go out anytime anywhere and most my friends have either picked my sorry self off the floor or have had to bail me out when I left a job half done.  (I still owe a college roommate who had to help me with a seriously personal issue after the wedgie-war to end all sent me to the emergency room in spasms! Love you Tami!)  I have tried every therapy on the books and some off the books. Some were helpful at controlling things, but no cure presented itself.  What it came down to was a resolve to just deal with pain and work as hard as I could between the downtime.

It progressively got worse.  I had a doctor tell my 18 year old self that I would be in a wheel chair by 30.  Last year this time, I was actually using a cane on bad days and I hurt so bad by 5 pm I could hardly make plans after dark.  I was starting to feel like Benjamin Button, hitting my 70s somewhere in my 30s.  The wheel chair ramp in my back yard (it came with the house) began calling my name!

Fast forward to now: I am on the top of my game.  I can honestly say I have never felt so good!  I found an alternative therapy that helped my back immensely, I started eating right (every pound I gain strains my back, but when I slim down I feel like flying!) and, most notably, I found a workout that actually works.  Any of you that are, um, vertabraeically challenged, have heard that core strength is key to alleviating pain. But how do you work out if your back hurts, and who can find the time?!

My awesome friend Tori introduced me to Bodyrocking about 4 months ago and it has changed everything for me.  Not only did Zuzana inspire me to get going, but the results have seriously kicked my clunker out of the junk yard! That ramp in the backyard is now reserved for skateboarding and if someone has to pick me up off the floor, it is because I fell over laughing.

I am no fitness guru, but I have tried lots of things (and Charity, I would love to do yoga with you!!) Nothing has ever brought results like this.  Seriously, try it.  www.bodyrock.tv.  They share free workouts everyday, averaging 12-15 minutes a day. They have over 400 of them archived so you can find one that fits you.  It is intense interval training, emphasis on intense; but they are short and sweet. If you can push yourself for only those few minutes, you will see results.  And if you have physical problems, you can modify to accommodate yourself in the privacy of your own home with no one but your 3 year old watching. Love it!

3 weeks into body rocking: see that tiny bump where a bicep goes? It wasn't there before. :)

I don’t have time to work out for an hour a day at the gym.  Last summer I did, as we were between houses and living at my folk’s.  I did Spin classes and weights 4-5 days a week and I still didn’t get the results I saw immediately with Bodyrocking.  It is a total body workout.  I am stronger everywhere. And the ever elusive abs I thought were a myth?…well I don’t have them, but I can feel them emerging. I’d like to say it is akin to greeting old friends I haven’t seen since before childbirth, but really, I don’t think I have ever had abs.  I am a believer now. They exist.  Just check out Zuzana’s and you will want a ticket on the 6 pack train.

So yes, I am thankful for my body.  It is amazing what you can do with one if you treat it right.  I can pick my kids up and play with them all day.  I can run the dirty dash without bodyguards with stretchers.  I can even do really crazy things like stand on my feet for more than half an hour without crashing.  I have energy abounding and I just feel good.

If anyone is interested, I am creating a Facebook page: Whereverthere Bodyrockers so you can work out from wherever you are.  It is a closed group, but I will add anyone who wants to rock!  You can post the workout you did, ask questions, brag about the first real man-pushup you did, or laugh when your scores are all higher than mine.  It would be fun to workout together!

A Note about Modesty: Please don’t get after me when you see her pics. To be frank: Zuz is an ex-pornstar who turned her life around and now inspires literally thousands to be their best. I find her and her body inspiring.  I actually enjoy watching her muscles move.  She works out in skimpy clothes.  It is what it is.  If it bothers you, I can start taping videos of myself working out, but I promise it won’t be a youtube sensation. It may even be considered an act of terrorism.  I adore her site. It is full of instructive nutrition and fitness tips. Zuzana has an awesome spirit and sincerity when she talks, and the forums are all constructive and encouraging to people of all types and levels.  I love that.  It is a rare thing to find on the Internet these days.  

My homemade sandbag and improv dip station, tools of the BR trade.

The funniest thing about this, is that last year I was literally considering purchasing a walker. This year I did buy one….I use it for pull-ups and dips while I save up for a real dip station. Zuzana uses that and a few other pieces of equipment, but they are easy to replicate with household items for free. Ask me on Facebook!

Happy Thanksgiving…I am immensely thankful for so many things.  I am thankful our bodies were designed to take care of us if we take care of them.  I am thankful for my family.  And I am thankful for all of you!

Body rock really works...or you could shortcut with photoshop.

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